writer'sblock posted a comment on Tuesday 26th June 2007 2:40am

While I really didn't like Dumbledore at first, now I can see that he really regrets what he has done. I really like this story, and I hope to read more of it soon.

Christopher Estep posted a comment on Saturday 9th June 2007 8:24am

To the reviewer that suggested a Polyjuiced Umbitch, while possible, it requires additional help (remember, Amelia Bones, in addition to being MLE Director, is #2 on the Wizengamot; if anyone has to run the gantlet of anti-Polyjuice detection, it's Amelia). That is precisely why I'm thinking an Imperioed Amelia (but likely by Umbitch, as she is notoriously anti-werewolf).

Ray D Elliott posted a comment on Friday 8th June 2007 11:26pm

wow.... cliffy.

Musings of Apathy posted a comment on Monday 4th June 2007 3:12pm

I was not going to read this chapter again, thinking it a repost without significant change, but your note about the level of changes convinced me to. I must say, excellent work. The changes made and the quality of writing are both excellent.

I thank you for your effort and your generosity toward our entertainment.

Mike (MoA)

The Resident posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 8:11pm

I am thankful that you were chosen to complete this story. I find the original chapters and your addition fit together seamlessly. I eagerly await the next update of this truly heartwarming story. Yes, I grieve for the Grangers, but I also rejoice for the Potters, all 3 of them. It is nice to see as well that the MOB (Manipulative old bastard) has decided to take responsibility for his actions (regardless of how 'forced' his awakening was) and that Snape has been brought to task for his pettiness. Keep up the great work.

IceBlades posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 2:19pm

gee, who on earth could be the new potions teacher...hmm? Lilly perhaps? and James as co-DADA teacher??? we shal see, eh?

I can't wait!

dogfoot75 posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 11:32am

I agree with Crys' comments, so I won't reiterate them.

However, I still think that there's too much Harry and not enough ensemble. This was an ensemble fic; leave Harry alone and let's get to the other players too.

Much better than the first run- around.

amysds posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 11:02am

I loved the chapter the last time you uploaded, but going in and reading the reviews - it makes sense about switching the flirty Hermione around to before she knew about her parents. Honestly I didn't even think about it to much at first then...yeah. So just to let you know, your doing a great job with the story and I'm glad that you look at the reviews and actually pay attention to what some say. Though some could be nicer when they say it! Also with Amelia Bones, it doesnt necessarily have to be polyjuice right? Assuming that the head of law enforcement can throw of imperious, than wouldn't a simple mind-weakening potion - taken once -lower her mental sheilds enough to let imperious take hold. Then while under the imperious be told to take more of the potion daily so she can't fight it off when the potion is wearing off?

amysds posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 10:54am

I loved the chapter the last time you uploaded, but going in and reading the reviews - it makes sense about switching the flirty Hermione around to before she knew about her parents. Honestly I didn't even think about it to much at first then...yeah. So just to let you know, your doing a great job with the story and I'm glad that you look at the reviews and actually pay attention to what some say. Though some could be nicer when they say it!

Princess Fictoria posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 6:15am

nicely done

Crys posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2007 12:35am

The rewrite did smooth things out.

Hermione's emotional state is more clear, Amelia's condition is now more confused (which is better than thinking that she's been a blind bigot before), and just a little more tension between Molly and Lily. That fight, BTW, is one that I'm honestly looking forward to.

That teasing in the carriage . . . I didn't see anything wrong with Harry's words. He was a little more forward than usual, but his explanation makes sense. As an aside, I'd suggest that he does indeed backslide (in word or action) on and off. He's consciously trying to be "adult" here. If he slips later and acts his age again, it goes a ways toward keeping him looking IC. Not suggesting he do something blindingly stupid, but just act like a teen in a stressful situation. Anyway, enough suggestions.

The H/Hr ship is toned down. The multiple-family alliance is being set in granite. Amelia's mental state has been thrown into question. AD is recognizing reality and starting to act in accordance to it. Snape has been smacked around (with more coming). Malfoy has been put in his place and given his yearly warning.

Looking forward to more.

in-kinsfire posted a comment on Saturday 2nd June 2007 11:43pm

I didn't really notice what changed.

Patches posted a comment on Saturday 2nd June 2007 2:05am

Thank you for finally having Severus punished for his actions. He deserves whatever he gets for the things he has done. I like the changes in this chapter. It makes a much clearer picture. I like the new, more mature Harry. I look forward to the rest of this story. pms

Banner posted a comment on Saturday 2nd June 2007 12:44am

* deep breath *
That was intense! Your portrayal of Snape was nothing less than masterly. His thoughts make my skin crawl.
Oh, Albus. I feel such sympathy for that old man, but you make sure that we never lose sight of the evil he has done.

Fishburne posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 12:13pm

okiedoke - having read both versions, this flows much smoother, not to mention a touch more in character with the original. Still has some lovely Kinsfire bits, and yes, a bunch more Neville (go Longbottom 3!). Not sure about Hermione's lack of reaction yet. Liked the bit with Susan about Madam Bones, could this be a stunt with Polyjuice and umbitch? wondering when that part will turn out. Loved the High Dudgeon and girlish snit. Still think Dumbles is a bit too sympathetic, especially since the original character was more or less confused by his own actions and his distict desire to believe he had no other choice and/or a lack of responsibilty, because after all, he is Dumbles the Great.

Kins, my good man, thank you for this loverly chapter thingy, and may all your gold flow and not get stopped up, requiring a rather painful trip to the doctor to get the bits unblocked.

Fish

A Founding Member of the Longbottom 3.

TxA_GunFighter posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 11:46am

Good chapter.

gunny

Turtle posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 11:41am

Wow. Just, wow. If that wasn't the final nail in the coffin of Dumbledore's 'for the greater good' motive, I don't know what was. Though, I think we could've used a bit of a scene with Dumbledore 'sitting in the corner, thinking about what he did'. It was perfectly great without it, but I could have used a little more insight into his introspection; it seemed a little too quick given that Dumbledore can be more stubborn than a Weasley when it comes to admitting he's wrong.

Definitely an interesting way to get Snape out of the picture. I think Snape's reaction was spot on. I would have been truely dumbfounded; liked the reinforcement with his internal monologue on the walk to the headmaster's office.

Also, taking Snape out of the picture is a good way to keep Harry (and likely Hermione, too) from hexing Snape in a effort at some retribution sometime during the school year. Wonder how Malfoy and the Death Nibblers will react to losing their teacher-ally.

I wouldn't put it past Voldemort to break Snape out; if only to inflict his own brand of punishment for being stupid and losing his place as 'spy in the Order'.

Can't wait to see who you bring in to replace Snape; if it's Slughorn, Dumbledore will have his work cut out convincing him to come out of retirement without Harry's help... I really doubt that Harry would go for it and James, Lily, et al. would likely seriously recommend against it. Maybe, in light of that, Lily would be willing to help herself? Slughorn does have a soft-spot for her. Then again, an original character may be even better, given where this story has gone.

-Turtle

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 11:37am

I like this updated version. I do, a little, feel sorry for Albus in that a whole heaping helping of fecal material is falling on him, and hitting the rotary impeller, all at once.

I note no confirmation of the actual death of Hermione's parents, just a strong presumption. We can hope that it is an erroneous presumption.

'Twill be interesting to see how Narcissa and Draco take to Harry being head of the Black family; I can see that putting quite a kink in things for them if he decided to play that way.

LoggingInSucksAss posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 10:38am

Now that is a chapter to be proud of! It could be argued that Hermione and company still weren't showing quite enough grief, but I think you nailed the characterizations here.

It wasn't a stereotypical Kinsfire characterization, but as much I like that kind of story I don't think that type of lightheartedness really belongs here. I think this chapter was perfect.

Thank you!

morriganscrow posted a comment on Friday 1st June 2007 10:34am

That was an inspired redo.
I was so pleased to see the lingering effects of Hermione's grief, and the confrontation with Draco was priceless.