Princess Fictoria posted a comment on Tuesday 7th August 2007 6:27am

I like just about everything in this chapter. I am a bit surprised at the arrest of Severus Snape. Yes, what he did was wrong, however he did it while acting in the position of a spy.

He gave information that was readily available for any looking, maybe not from Hermione or others in the Order, but information that could have been gotten if someone tried hard enough. Yes the Grangers were killed and he rejoiced in their death. But really, he did not break any laws. Other than the laws that he was already breaking in his function as a spy.

However, it was a strategic bomb to allow him to be arrested for it. Not only will he be able to get out of it, probably... but he has a lot of sensitive information that could be used by the enemy.

Much better if he were obliviated fully and sent to St Mungos. If they want him to be hurt, at least do it in a manner that cannot hurt others.

Infin1x posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 11:18pm

Well this looks like it's moving in a nice direction. The Hermione, Parvati and Lavender talk is surprisingly enough something I don't think has been done before.

Patches posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 7:28pm

Wow! A lot going on in this chapter. Severus really went over the line and doesn't even know that it was wrong. He is really twisted. His fight with the Potters is really too much. To kill 2 people just because he hated her boyfriends father is really cruel and deserves whatever punishment he is given. Lily and James have messed up to some degree but there are others that are so much worse. Amelia Bones is a big surprise. I never would have thought of her as prejudiced. Dumbledore really messed up but he had the best intentions even if his method was horrendous. It is good to see Hermione finding some unexpected friends in Parvarti and Lavender. That and letting Harry know that she really would like to be his girlfriend is great. I look forward to more of this story. thanks for writing. pms

amysds posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 2:34pm

I loved this chapter, I felt so bad for Harry to be henpecked like that in front of everyone. How embarrasing!! Can he have no sense of humor or what?! Yeah I saw she somewhat regretted it but still... I have One request to make of you Please Please Please DON'T get Lily pregnant!!! I'm so tired of Harry's parents popping back up one way or another only for Lily to be pregnant a few months later. Please let them concentrate on Harry for now. Also they should have more talks with him about his likes etc and growing up Dursley. Also can't wait for his parents to see him fly!!

ed168 posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 10:39am

What Noble House is Harry the Head of? His father was still alive so he will only be the Heir of Potter House. Sirius willed the House of Black to the Potter Head not Harry specifically, so Harry is also just the Heir of Black. Only after James dies will Harry be the Head of both Potter and Black.

Kinsfire replied:

If you recall, when he went to Gringott's with his family, he was told that there was a slight problem. Sirius had written the will in Ministry proper language, but left word with the goblins that specifically stated "Harry". By James telling him that he was permitted to take on the mantle of leadership of the Black family, it permitted him to in fact take over the family.


Basically, because his father was willing to allow Sirius's wishes, everything worked out for the goblins, and James allowed the spirit of the will to kick in.

TxA_GunFighter posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 10:19am

Outstanding.

gunny

jdcox61 posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 8:46am

hmm... I like this story, but this is some pretty angsty harry here. Good work all around, i hope snape gets what's coming to him

Christopher Patton posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 6:23am

I really like the interaction between Hermione, Lavender, and Parvati. I can't think of any other story that show them being willing to put their past behind them and try supporting each other. It was very nicely done.

It's nice to have you posting parts again as I missed reading new stuff from you. I hope that your original work is coming along as well.

Thanks...

Melferd posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 5:58am

Woohoo!! More goodness!!

***hugs poor Harry's swirling head***
I love that you don't have Hermione skipping along in tra-la-la fashion after her parent's death, Thanks for that!

Burr....Snape on a Quest....

BJH posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 2:39am

You know it's interesting how, with the exception of his juvenile infatuation with Lily, how close to the final canon depiction of Snape this characterization is.

BJH

Wonderbee31 posted a comment on Monday 6th August 2007 12:34am

Great part here, and looks like Severus is going to try something anyway, too bad that he's so filled with self-hate, and wondering how he's so brave in canon as to be named a part of a child Harry has, and also liked the way that Hermione and the girls in her year finally start to become true roomates, and looking forward to what will happen between her and Harry later on.

Adam posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 5:53pm

nice chapter, its good to see hermione is finally making friens with her dorm mates :) anf the interaction between harry and hermione was interesting.

not surprised by snape though, he always struck me as the sort of person who would do as much damage as possible if was to be caught.

Alorkin posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 4:58pm

OK, Albus has managed to redeem himself somewhat in the eyes of his most fervent supporter.

Ah unrecognized love. Brings a tear to my eye. *sniff!*

Seriously: It's funny, Keith. Hermione feels about losing her parents the same way I feel about losing Pauline. It's been eleven years, but I still feel her death intensely. My daughter is more fortunate. Since her mother died when she was a baby, she's never known her other than a few pictures and some letters.

Lavender and Parvati are surprising. You've turned them into something other than airheads. It makes for a refreshing change.

I've always hated that verse. While it is important to address adult concerns, too many have buried their child, and the result is unhealthy people with a fixation on survival rather than living. I am fond of saying: "Children are the most perfect people in the world...and then we turn them into adults. What a terrible thing to do."

Lavender and Parvati are good friends, and perhaps Hermione will finally learn to relax. Harry will help there, but only when she's ready.

Somebody Kill Snape! Please?

Alorkin

morriganscrow posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 4:43pm

Excellent chapter!
It was so good to get this update from you, and it was worth the wait.
Poor clueless Harry is a treat, as is the perfectly vindictive Snape at the end.
Keep up the great work.

Alorkin posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 4:14pm

Snivellus needs to be put down.

Albus' letter to Hermione was far beyond unfeeling. It unforgivably cruel. He seemed to be mre concerned with the fact that he didn't like to write the letters than the fct that Hermione's parents had been murdered. Someone needs to slap the dogshit out of him!

Harry's scene with Lily was so sweet I had to brush my teeth...and floss...twice!

"You must learn to deal with taunts without violence, young grasshopper," he said. "You only shame yourself otherwise." LOVED it! Draco also needs a lesson in slap-ology.

Poor Susan. Learning her aunt is a bigot can't be easy.

Lily's argument is perfectly delivered. I'm wondering why Albus hasn't exploded or burned to a little pile of ashes. The problem with a lunatic like Albus, is that he actually BELIEVES in his vision.

At long last, Snivellus reaps the reward for his actions. Unfortunately it is far too late. Albus is absolutely correct. He is responsible, and should be held accountable.

Wolfric posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 3:57pm

Thanks for the good chapter. It should be interesting to see what Snape tries to do. He might find somebody will shut him up permanently if he tries to rock the boat too much. Poor Harry Hermione will be even more volitile than usual. Please keep writing. W.

IceBlades posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 3:32pm

::whines:: NEED MORE STORY!

Great chapter!

Please keep writing.

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 2:47pm

Hmm, an interesting chapter all around and 'fascinating'. Albus does seem to be learning, albeit slowly, as do the others involved, with the exception of Snape, in this chapter. I liked the idea of the girl talk and of the girls in Harry's year starting to grow up (ghod help the guys if they don't similarly mature). The banter 'tween James and Lily was good, too, and I loved the prank at the end.

'Twill be interesting to see what mischief Snivellus is still up to.

Shawn Pickett posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 1:37pm

Damn! I was rather shocked to see an update from you Keith! Great chapter, I found it interesting the direction you took things with Hermione. A much needed wake up call apparently. The last bit with Snape was kind of an evil cliffie though. Makes you wonder what the bastich is planning. I'm glad Dumbledore seems to be clueing in, though I wonder if the students reaction to Severus being relieved of duty tells him something.

PhishBulb posted a comment on Sunday 5th August 2007 12:40pm

And attention whore, drama queen Harry enters the scene. If you were just going to write the same old thing with the same old Harry why take over someone else's story?

I thought it was great that someone was taking over this fic - but you've already Kinsfired Harry to the point where he's completely unlikeable and unreal. Why? Why not try something different than your usual writing and keep things in the original style that worked so well for Liz? Why have the characters spend half the chapter apologizing for rediculous comments and behaving in ways that no real person ever would. Just why?

It's not that I think you're a bad writer, it's just that you're a very distinctive writer who has a tendency to imbue his characters with traits I find annoying. I'd love to see this story finished. I really do wish you luck with the rest.