By Kinsfire
Reviews
Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd June 2014 6:44pm
"Perhaps," Percy said. "But it makes no difference to the job ahead of us."
"I know one of my demands, though," Harry said as Percy started to rise.
"What might that be?" Percy asked.
"Amelia Bones' head on a pike or a platter. I don't appreciate her sending her Aurors after me any more than I appreciated her telling me that she had a right to use me as a weapon or tool. I'd thought she was different, but she was just another power abuser."
"Actually," Percy said, "she was relieved of duty - cashiered out - when she began to argue against Dumbledore and his attitudes. You must have made an impression, because she publicly blasted him for treating you no better than a weapon or tool to use and throw away." Harry's eyebrows rose at that."
So did mine. Amelia seemed as arrogant as Dumb-ass-dork last chapter. DId you write her that way on purpose?
Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd June 2014 6:07pm
"
"Sorry about the points," Harry said, "but he was determined to hit me for things that happened over the summer. I forced some friends of his to explore Syracuse. If they were stupid, they assumed I meant Greece." This was said in a voiced slightly louder than conversational.
"Geez," Dean said. "Did you know that Snape could turn puce?"
"It's not a good colour for him, I'm sure," Harry said without looking. He seated Hermione and then kissed her hand, then turned to Heidi and helped her sit. "By the way, guys, this is Heidi. She's my bodyguard for the foreseeable future."
"Don't take this wrong, Harry," Colin Creevey said, "but you're luckier than anyone has a right to be. A beautiful bodyguard, and two girlfriends? Who know about each other?"
"Long story, and you're right. I'm luckier than I deserve."
Totally cracked up laughing at the end of this Ch. Moving on.
Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd June 2014 5:42pm
Moving swiftly on to the next Ch., but can I just say that this is getting even better already..... :-D
Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd June 2014 5:15pm
Moving swiftly on to Ch. 3!! PLEASE make sure you finish this, even if it takes the next six months.
voldemort008 posted a comment on Tuesday 4th March 2014 11:18am
Well thats me done. No sense reading about a gay harry because thats what he apparently is. Any almost 16 year old that turns down sex is either gay, has a tiny penis, or is so afraid of girls that its ridiculous. Sometimes people go so far out of their way to make harry a 'gentleman' that it just ends up unrealistic.
chrwain01 posted a comment on Friday 3rd May 2013 9:33am
Thanks, I enjoyed this. Not so much your characterisaton of Tonks but the broader story certainly.
One scene I definitely felt was missing was the one where Heidi took Hermione, Cho and Harry out to a club in Paris. Based on your writeup of Munich I think that might have been a lot of fun.
Other than that a great fun fast paced frolic, thanks for sharing.
Nytefyre posted a comment on Saturday 9th March 2013 2:43am
Nicely paced and well plotted. This was a fun story to read... one that I couldn't stop reading.
Thanks for posting.
sweetie_v2003 posted a comment on Thursday 14th February 2013 5:39pm
I FOUND THIS STORY FUN AN DIFFERENT. THANKS
4rm36uy posted a comment on Monday 11th February 2013 6:00pm
Nearly died laughing when I read the name of the new MLE Director. This was my second time reading it and only just caught it.
Keep up the great material.
Matt
DAMNED posted a comment on Tuesday 30th October 2012 2:20pm
GOOD STORY I LIKE HOW IT TURNED OUT.
loretta537 posted a comment on Monday 29th October 2012 3:08pm
this was a great story
thetaxzombie posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2012 6:21pm
In this story Remus is far and away by biggest disappointment. By that I mean his selling out Harry is what I find disappointing. He's not a wolf, he's a piss poor lap dog who does tricks on command for his demented master. I find him disgusting.
This story evokes a good deal of emotion, for the most part negative ones, which considering it's title and plot is understandable. There are of course some positive ones popping up and it will end on a positive note if I recall correctly.
It is a good solid read.
thetaxzombie posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2012 5:27pm
A goodly bit of nastiness going on in this chapter. Both the MOB and the GG continue to dig their graves deeper and deeper.
I can't help but wonder if Bumblebore isn't slightly dimented. Or maybe I should drop the slightly. He definately has a god complex. All knowing, always right.
As for Snape, he is nothing but a disgusting individual. Why anyone likes Snape totally boggles my mind. He has NO redeeming characteristics. Just a petty, nasty man that has no business in a school, or around any living beings period.
THe last line where the MOB decides that Poppy needs to die is pretty much proof that he is beyond redemption. Snape has been beyond redemption for quite some time.
thetaxzombie posted a comment on Monday 27th August 2012 3:02pm
Hermione not being able to throw off the Imperious until the MOB tells her to hurt Harry makes since. It makes the letter she sent earlier in the chapter believable.
I'm more of a fan of Tonks Remus being on Harry's side but not all that bothered when they switch sides. It makes for a change of pace.
That the Goblins are thick with Bumblebore is also a change of pace. Seems like 90%+ of the tales where they are involved have them plotting with Harry on how to put one over on him. Or at least the ones I've read.
A good solid opening chapter. The stage is set, now on with the play.
keichan2 posted a comment on Tuesday 24th July 2012 1:55pm
This was a very good story! I really liked reading it! Thanks for sharing!
Arkarian23 posted a comment on Monday 2nd July 2012 3:58am
definitely enjoyed reading thsi fic. I expected lemons from the way the story was portrayed but that's ok.
valdiusmacto posted a comment on Sunday 3rd June 2012 10:36pm
As seems to be a pattern with me reading your work...I like this in pure spite of my normal dislike for Betrayal fics. I also normally have a fairly strong dislike for large numbers of OC's. You managed to make a well developed, well crafted story. With well crafted OC's to boot.
Strangely the greatest criticism I have with the story is actually the lack of smut. Normally I'm not a big fan of much if any being in a good story. It tends to ruin otherwise excellent tales by changing the focus of both the writer and the reader. In this case however you managed to develop the characters in such a way, without detracting from the characters themselves or the story, as to make it a logical conclusion. It actually felt as if the story was *missing* something. Strange. Perhaps I have stumbled on to why women seem to find value in romance novels? Disturbing thought that. I better go watch something get blown up.
Anyway, another good read!
wendy1 posted a comment on Wednesday 25th April 2012 12:57pm
Great story! Thanks so much for writing
FeNo posted a comment on Sunday 18th March 2012 9:46pm
I'm everytime astonished how normal and unmentionable usual you make your favorite polyamorous pairings seem. And therefore i cannot find anything wrong in this constellations other than pity the boys at Hogwarts that won't get any girlfriend because of this massive hoarding and maybe sometimes the short timetable you give them to fall in deep, neverending love or at least from confess these old and deeply buried feelings until they realize their relief... It's somewhat straining my traditional "suspension of disbelief" when they make something that complex work in mere months time and will be happily ever after, but then... it's just words and i can very well imagine they took a handful of years instead of weeks or months when it will make me happy...
But enough of this generalities and on to this - once again - exquisite tale of betrayal and forgiveness. Epic, simply epic. I enjoy to see how Tom Riddle was losing all importance once Harry had found his way and slipped off Dumbledore's leash. The idea that the famous Rowling prophecy were a fake and stemmed from the saga of Beowulf is ingenious in my book and the other one is blissfully short and pregnant, many another author would have tortured us with a complicated array of riddles and vagaries of twenty lines horribly rhimed poem or somesuch while all the time it would have boiled down to "Riddle goes down, but beware... Dumbledore is getting unhinged and will use this chance to go Dark!"
Your characters were pleasantly thought out and showed adepth not really found in the original works this story is based on... Ron's change could never have happened in the original book six just because.... the characters there DID NOT change. Or only when needed to fulfil her shipping preferences (Ginny)... The way Cho has worked on her faults from fifth year e.g. is also above everything she-who-holds-the-rights could not have managed. And it was GOOD. Just like Kaatje and Heidi the two OCs moving much of the story along during its first half. Okay, some aspects might be called "sueish", but i'm convinced that most of those characters is convincing and could be found in real life persons without much effort (other than magical powers of course :P)
And now for something completelly different and the one unpleasant thing ... the rise and fall of Albus the First, Dark Overlord of the realms of Britain and Ireland and his willing helpers... I'm meanwhile used that both Ginny and Molly lend themselves to very negative interpretations of their motives and deeds. Seeing here all the other heroes of the Order i secretly adore and worship in my private "fanon" happily joining the wagon and doing evil!Albusses decrees is a bit hurting, but for most of them you've shown good reasons and motives... Minerva or Remus e.g. Shack and Arthur and Tonks are a bit in a grey zone as they are only shown zealous but not really looked into in regards to the why and how it came so far they did never doubt nor ask for reasons for What Albus is doing there before their own eyes... at the very latest doing an Imperius on Hermione JUST to get a letter to influence Harry to their plans would have been a wake up call ot any decent person and i'm having some problems with seeing them not as such, some problems (e.g. why neither Remus nor Tonks' Family searched contact to Harry for his 10 year exile befóre book 1)
Of course Albus actions are believeable, nobody is likely to realize when he turns criminal or insane. It's just so sad seeing his life's work go down the sewer so fast and utterly... whereas i don't have any sympathy for canon!Dumbledore for exactly the reasons you've taken and enlarged for your story, i still have a certain kind of respect for his underlying values and the deep grief we were introduced to with book 7. But then being shaken in his core beliefs by having involuntarily killed his baby sister during a fight about what the greater good entails is no good reason to hemper any other persons struggle with his own beliefs and motivations and to railroad them to a young and undignified grave on the vague chance they might be able to return from the Dead. In a certain way these deeds are the much greater sin Albus Dumbledore would have to justify himself before a otherworldly court and judgement compared to his youthful temper and his great and horrible price. especially when seen in the light that the same reasons had already made possible that Voldemort turned dark and came into his power just for the opposite way to read them and feel compelled to do nothing against it. But i'm babbling... i just wanted to show how much i agree with your storyline and the underlying analysises of Dumbledore and his minions and how glad i am that i could read this variant and his many innovative ideas and plot twists. Thank you!
Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Tuesday 3rd June 2014 6:51pm