Patches posted a comment on Monday 29th May 2006 9:12am

This is a very difficult story line for me to read right now but I can understand why Harry is attracted to Hermione's mother. I can also see why he and Hermione tried to do all they could to help Jocelyn. It will be interesting to see how you work this story out. Thanks for writing. pms

Mariposa posted a comment on Monday 29th May 2006 12:11am

Lovely ending! The view is just beautiful hanging off of this cliff!!!!!

But really this was a good ending. This chapter seemed rushed in parts and wonderfully detailed in others. And also for some reasone Hermione's character didn't seem consistent but it was more of a feeling and I can't give specifics. I know sucky general review. All in all I like it and I eagerly await more! :o)

Manatheron posted a comment on Sunday 28th May 2006 6:44am

Oooohh The angst and suspense are AWEFUL!

... I hope they last!

Renzo7 posted a comment on Sunday 28th May 2006 5:21am

awesome, keep it up!

Joshua Scuzz Jenkins posted a comment on Sunday 28th May 2006 4:14am

Kinsfire you completely and totally suck. you are such an excellent writer we can't help but be addicted to the stories then have to sit patiently waiting for more. it's just cruel.

annihilation posted a comment on Sunday 28th May 2006 12:31am

I already like the story.

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 2:55pm

Whoa!! Now that's quite an ending. The ensuing conversation between mother and daughter is likely to be "fascinating", to say the least.

Princess Fictoria posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 1:45pm

Wow!

I thought this was going to be a shallow puff piece... but you have filled it with a surprising amount of emotional depth. The stunned reaction of the women and the intense emotional pain that Harry shared was enough to make me sniffle. I eagerly look forward to reading more!

ridmania posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 1:34pm

love it!!

EricThorsen posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 12:09pm

A touch angsty... but it makes sense. Good work on not making this grouping too easy on them.

Shawn Pickett posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 11:02am

Well damn, that's just a right mess and a half. Great writing though, I look forward to the imminent conversation between Jocelyn and Hermione, and the one that will follow between them and Harry.

jdcox61 posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 9:33am

I think this is a pretty cool story, it's certainly got my attention as well. I can't wait for you to update again!

Alorkin posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 7:45am

Keith, Much as I love all your other stories, and as much as I *really* hate to say this, this chapter isn't up to your usual standard. You have left too many weak places in the storyline, as well as the expressions you have used. For instance: "I know you and that dead fool headmaster of yours..." doesn't use Voldemorts's established speach patterns. He more likely would have said: "I know that you and that muggle loving fool, Dumbledore..."
Of course, being the great and powerful Wizard of...oh, wait. OK, Being the terrible Dark Lord, Vader...no, that's not it. *Checks script* Oh, yeah, here it is. OK, Being the feared dark lord VOLDEMORT, I suppose no grammer teacher is going to take him to task.
Hermione's use of the expression: "Sweet Merlyn" Is somewhat out of character. Ginny would likely evoke Merlyn as did her father in book 2, or 'the Goddess of Life', but being muggleborn, Hermione would have been brought up with some kind of religeous background, even if it's only the barest pass-by, such as celebrating Christmas rather than the winter solstice, and the same for Easter. She most likely would use the expression 'Oh God' or 'sweet Jesus', instead.
The description of Frank and his paramour, Cognac, are really weak. "...all-but tore each other's clothes off and started having sex..." Urh? Of course the follow up was a bit better. Harry scrubbing his skin raw was nicely written, but the first part of the following Harry/Hermione scene, seems rather rushed. Did you have too much coffee that night? Couldn't sleep?
The second half, starting with Hermione's viewing of the photographs, shines in the manner of the rest of your stories. The loving they shared, was desperate at first, and later, soft and comforting.
The interaction between Harry, Hermione and Jocelyn,(nice choice of name, by the way. Helen and Emma are far too overused.)following Harry's revelation, is like something out of a 'cheezy romance novel'(your words, not mine.) rather than the anger and denial one would find in reality. It's almost what JKR did to Sirius in The-Book-That-Should-Never-have-Been-Written. You did, however recover it somewhat with Harry's thoughts.
Your deascriptions of the year following the divorce was minimalistic at best. Yes, I understand it's not critical to the plot, but I think you could have filled it in a bit.
The last dozen or so paragraphs have returned to your usual standard. The angst Harry induces is well written, and the reactions of both Hermione and Jocelyn are literally palpable.
As always, I anxiously await the next chapter of whichever story you work on. Please feel free to ignore the 'do not reply' flag you have on my reviews. I swear! It was an accident! I clicked the mouse on the wrong spot. Please forgive me! (No cruciatus, this time, though.)
Alorkin

Bernd Jacobitz posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 7:21am

Ah Harry at his best, but grown up somewhat. Damn good character work on his behalf.

freakyfinger posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 6:18am

This is definitely weird . . .

DJ posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 3:56am

OK we know it works out at some point from your warnings but how much crap are Harry & Co. going to have to go thru befor we get there? Can't wait to see Keep it up.

whyshouldicare posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 3:25am

i liked it.are hermione and her mum going to be with harry?if they r r they going to have a 3 way?

Ben Russell-Gough posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 3:13am

Uh... Yeah, that's Harry alright. Assume he is wicked and act accordingly. I really think, if nothing else, Snape is right in this area to call him arrogant - he assumes he has offended before he asks the other person if he has offended him.

So, what next? A ISOS-style chase? Or will Hermione do what Hermione does best - find him and slap him upside the head? ;-)

BenRG's Rating: 7/10

Coolone007 posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 3:04am

Wow Talk about the other shoe falling! I am very couriouse to see how Hermione, a very jealouse person will deal with harry being with both women, maybe. I can't wait to read more. I also hope you update your other stories.

FaithU posted a comment on Saturday 27th May 2006 2:36am

Can't. Stop. There. No fair !