rodrigo posted a comment on Sunday 18th September 2005 4:26am for Chapter 11

well what to say after chapter 10, for the first time ever i was preapre to write a really bad review with only bad words.
but as always i held my self back.

and then chapter 11 came, great work.
loved the part where the weaslies(the bad ones) came clean and all that and the way they tried to figuere out how to make up to him.
and the way you write Dung and the rest of the order leaving them as they did.
loved it, great written as always, loved every singel chapter.

Alorkin posted a comment on Sunday 18th September 2005 3:10am for Chapter 11

You really managed to pull that one out nicely. Like Harry, I believed the advance copy. I was rather surprised you didn't make him go berserker. Instead the null emotions person was in many ways, even more disturbing.
With the Weasleys, with the exception of the unheavenly two, being pretty much rendered persona non grata(is?), by Bill's confession, I'd suspect they'd be scrambling to get Harry to forgive. As Homey D Clown says: "I don't think so!"
With the most likely suspect in the Prophet charmswork, to be Narcissa, I believe it's time to begin the party. As the Klingons say (Romans, actually) "Revenge is a dish, best served cold!" Oh, BTW, I agree with the way you wrote Harrys ideas of getting rid of ol' Voldyface, including his own sacrifice. Having been a soldier for a good portion of my life, i understand that ambushes are a common and effective method of eliminating an enemy in the muggle world. It's a matter of 'the good of the many...'. Please update this soon. I await your next post. Alorkin

Chris posted a comment on Sunday 18th September 2005 12:21am for Chapter 11

The whole "prank" of the fake news article was handled extremely well. Harry’s reaction was believable as was his unwillingness to talk about his feelings regarding the girls’ deaths. Which, of course, led to the continuing misunderstanding of the others and their bewilderment as to Harry’s sudden death wish. Personally, I loved the fact that Dumbledore sounded as if he was in a panic once he read the charmed paper. That shows that he truly cares for Harry and knows what Narcissa’s end-game was.

As to Bill and Charlie’s confession, I liked the fact that the lie had grown so large that they were still embarrassed or down-right scared to admit that they had concocted the original lie. They obviously did not think that Harry would be so completely ostracized, but once it had begun they were too spineless to admit to their childish behavior.

A few things struck me as interesting with this scene. The first is that neither Bill nor Charlie even attempted to apologize or excuse their behavior to anybody. They simply admitted what they did; not a very effective way to attain atonement.

The next point was Ginny. Even with Bill’s testimony, she was still considering Harry to be the scum of the Earth. I appreciated the fact that she did not immediate realize her total and complete screw-up. Her utter destruction of any chance of a resumption of a relationship with any of the five was summed up with her gut reaction.

Another fun plot point was that Harry himself doesn’t even have to be the one who is aggressively antagonistic towards the Weasleys anymore; the whole of the Order was full of condemnation for the actions of the hypocritical family, including the Order members who had not previously been a vocal supporter of Harry and his version of the truth.

The only downside of the confession was that Hermione was not there as she wished. I would think that as much as Fred, George, Remus, and other members of the Order may hold a grudge against the Weasleys, the family had best watch out for Harry’s four girls when it comes to the revenge. Now that the truth is known, I wouldn’t be surprised to see the girls try and get at least a little bit of payback for Harry’s sake. His reputation at school and within the Order was completely destroyed by his once-friends. I could imagine the girls could attempt a bit of turn-about on Ron and Ginny.

Speaking of the girls, Harry’s confessions of love to them was quite well done and unique to each individual. I like how he shocked Pansy by his response to her statement. This showed that she has come to understand Harry’s nuances quite well. To me the best part was Hermione’s scene. I like how it was saved for last. Having Harry have his breakdown was necessary and he would have held it in as long as possible, so it was with the fourth girl that his emotions would have snapped. And since Hermione has known him the longest, the symbolism of her comforting him at this moment was perfect.

I do wonder if we are going to find out about the attack on the four girls. Was it an attempt to actually kill them, or merely a prank that got out of hand? I mean was Narcissa in on the planning, or did she take advantage of an opportune moment to torment Harry? Oh, and Harry might be done with Narcissa as far as his plans for payback, but I would imagine the girls would want to have something to say, seeing as her plan was to not only torment Harry, but to possibly drive him to suicide.

Anyway, a very emotional chapter handled quite deftly

Chris

shlomi posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 11:06pm for Chapter 11

great chapter!!!!!
i was really surprised that it came out so quick but in the end it was better for u becuase otherwise i would have harassed you until uou would have uploaded it
again great chapter
update soon!

wen posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 7:20pm for Chapter 11

Great story, question being how many chapters have been planned for?

Update soon!

gryffindors posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 4:14pm for Chapter 11

that's what i'm talking about, alittle less angst and alot more happy moments
you made my day, thank you.

Dave posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 2:36pm for Chapter 11

And here I thought it was maybe a 'disappearing trick' performed by the ladies!

William Fowler posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 12:58pm for Chapter 11

Okay... okay! So you're not an unmitigated !#$q#$! anymore. Great chapter... by the way... don't disinherit Narcissa, make her marry Remus. Then, on a full moon when he's angry.. "RIP, TEAR, SLICE!" she's dead!

William

Shawn Pickett posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 12:38pm for Chapter 11

And you were worried about howlers? You knocked this chapter out fast enough to make the last one barely a cliff hanger. Now on with the repentant arse kissing from the scum known as the rest of the student body at Hogwarts! Outstanding work Keith, thank you. Oh bye the way, interesting choice of names for Mr. and Mrs. Granger.

Mark posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 12:09pm for Chapter 11

Ooh, sneaky! Nice way to dance out of harms way there. The girls are alive, the Weasley's have been exposed as the turncoats they are and it looks like Harry has a plan to take out Tom and his band of buggerers. Woo hoo! Can't wait for the next part!! Definitely looking forward to the downfall of the House of Malfoy!

David Thacker posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 11:40am for Chapter 11

Posted this in the wrong chapter.Great chapter and I know that the owl that Harry got was not the full story.Keep up the great work.Now we need to see what Ron and Ginny and the rest are going to do and if Ron stays a jerk.

verahsa posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 10:25am for Chapter 11

Wonderful. That cliffie was an absolute nightmare, mind you, and I ought to slap you silly for it, but it turned out okay.

The biggest bonus? Knowing Ginny lost Harry and KNOWS it wasn't because of what her brothers said. It's wonderful to find that out. =)

Thank you for writing such an intriguing story!

Christopher L. Estep posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 10:06am for Chapter 11

*WHEW*! The nastiness that can be accomplished with Illusion Charms. As for who cast it...sorry, Albus and Amelia, but I vote for Draco, NOT Narcissa. People are wondering "Why NOT Narcissa?" Actually, two DIFFERENT reasons from the story itself, and a third having to do with the story's author.

1. Narcissa didn't say so much as ONE spiteful OR hateful word to Harry while Draco was leaving Hogwarts. Harry didn't say anything spiteful to Narcissa, either. Instead, he gave her the SAME choice Sirius himself would have had he been alive.

2. Narcissa has FAR less reason to hate Harry than Draco does, especially in her own mind. Given that Harry was NOT as spiteful to her as he certainly COULD have been, given how both her son AND her husband have treated him, must be gnawing away at her mind. (Harry's actions regarding saving Draco from that rebounded curse would further decrease the likelihood of her being involved.) Draco, on the other hand, holds grudges like Gringott's hoards gold.


3. Lastly, there is Keith himself. The man has NEVER written a Dark!Narcissa story in his life. "Family Matters" is a Neutral!Narcissa story, while both "Sorceror's Apprentice" and "With A Little Help From My Friends" are plainly Lightside!Narcissa (in the last, she will actually become one of Harry's wives). So the odds are VASTLY against Narcissa being behind that charm.

Also, Bill comes clean. *Completely clean.* However, the twins are so torqued off that they will likely leave the Weasley Family anyway.


Finally, the ladies had turned out to be merely *injured*, rather than killed; thus four engagements, starting with Susan's, take place in Extremely Short Order. However, Harry *still* plans to invite Tom Riddle to a barbecue. (Given a sufficient amount of flammables, even a Dark Lord can be toasted to a crisp.) The trick is, Riddle tends to eschew/ignore Muggle means of causing death, so Harry using Muggle methods against him (the Anarchist's Cookbook, which has caused the FBI and Department of Homeland Security no end of conniptions, is a real book, and is, in fact, still in print) is only fitting.

BJH posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 10:03am for Chapter 11

Man, you had me going there with that last chapter. I didn't think you would kill them but then I thought that it would be just the catalyst for Harry to do the 'mutual take-out' that you often refer too. I'm glad I was fooled. And I'm doubly glad you didn't leave me and your other readers in suspense waiting for this chapter.

Now there are only two questions left: How does Harry take out Voldemort and what happens to Ginny? What happens to Ginny will define what happens to the rest of the Weasleys although Ron will always likely be on the outs.

It would be amusing to see Harry attack the strong of Voldemort and have Tommy give Draco the opportunity of a lifetime. "Kill Potter and become one of the Inner Circle." The triple backlash on an AK would take out Draco, Lucius, and Narcissa; all the while leaving Harry guilt free.

I am still sort of hoping he abandons the WW afterwards though. Let them learn to fend for themselves.

BJH

Barkeeper posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 9:18am for Chapter 11

You know, i'm kinda looking forward, when the Weasley's hear of the engagements......

Vote!
1: Ginny will blow up Bill and Charlie (followed by Option 2 or 3)
2: Ginny will kill herself with a spoon (or with whatever..)
3: Ginny quits Hogwarts and enters a convent becoming a nun

Any more Ideas?

*evilgrin*

Greg posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 8:58am for Chapter 11

Great chapter! I was surprised with the way you did that article. I can't wait to see what happens with Narcissa. :-)
I think Harry should disown Narcissa anyways.
Keep up the good work.

dave posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 8:47am for Chapter 11

Keith,
Another great chapter, and you had me convinced the girls were actually dead. Last night when I read 10, I thouht there was a strong possibility that there was something fishey with the article, but the first part of this chapter had me convinced that you actually killed them. I was glad to see that the Weasley's finally confessed and am looking forward to the fallout from this new revelation. So how does it feel to be the Father of the smartest witch in Hogwarts. Looking forward to the next installment.

Dave

Shannon posted a comment on Saturday 17th September 2005 8:23am for Chapter 11

That was so much better. I thought I might have to come and hunt you down....(ha ha). Now that Dark Harry isn't really a problem anymore, when do we get to find out about horny Harry and how he (and the girls)relieve that particular problem.